Imaginary chicken dinner

You have to meet people where they are. This also applies in senior care. 

People with Alzheimer's or other dementia issues live in their own worlds. Some people relive events from their distant past or they are hallucinating and you have to play along or you might upset them. Family members often don't want to play along because they have a hard time accepting their loved ones aren't the same people they used to be. 

Client: Oh, look at that clown on the other side of the street!

Me: Wow! Nice flaming hair!

Client's daughter: There's no clown there, Dad!

Client: You need new glasses or something?

Of course, it's frustrating when the client tells me to go away, that I'm not supposed to be in their house, and no matter how many times I explain I'm with the agency that helps them, they won't remember or accept me. Short-term memory goes first for the majority of people. The most frustrating thing for me is when their grown kids walk through the door and the clients remember them right away. Then the kids don't understand why I'm less than enthusiastic about taking care of their parent.

Some people ask me something and ask again in two minutes, five times in a row. I lie to those people a lot. In fact, I lie to my clients a lot as a rule. 

Client: You still have to cook dinner for the husband and kids when you get home?

Me: Yeah. (The kids are not with me today. I'm not married. I'll be going home to an empty house.)

Client: What're you gonna make, do you know?

Me: Oh, maybe chicken. (I'm vegan.) It's in the fridge.

Client: Does your husband help?

Me: Yeah, he'll probably get it started.

Client: You're lucky. I couldn't trust my husband in the kitchen at all. (Her husband died years ago.)

Familiar things bring a feeling of safety to people whose world is crumbling around them. It's normal to be married, have kids, and eat chicken. I'm not normal, but at least I'm meeting my clients where they are.




Comments

  1. E ternityAugust 30, 2024 at 4:55 AM

    This stirred feelings that I can't eloquently put into words as you do. My grandmother who lived with us had it. It started with a imaginary cat that ran across the highway causing a accident by her. Stange though, she would talk in her sleep and talk about the little people. She would have conversations for over 30min at a time. We would sit in the living room and listen. One time she said, "oh, they're listening? " and she stopped talking. Just a random interesting story. Maybe a qhht session sometime ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. SonyaSeptember 4, 2024 at 2:13 PM

    Hi! Thank you for the comment! I'd love to facilitate a QHHT session for you. Please send me an email at cosmic88connections@gmail.com.

    ReplyDelete

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